She Suppresses Her Feelings For A Friend

From Love Notes of Joe d' Mango


HELLO Joe,

I'm typically perceived as a strong individual, easy to get along with, not that stunningly beautiful, but I do have my share of suitors. It's just that I never got interested in them, not after my last breakup three years ago.

I transferred almost two years ago to the firm I'm connected with right now. Being the friendly person that I am, I easily got close to my peers. Among them, it was Rico who seemed to appreciate me and became my constant companion. It started with Rico telling me all about his likes, his life, and his fiancée. He admitted that it was only me that he was able to confide, aside from Janine, his fiancée. Janine was working in another country and was due to return in Manila mid next year for their wedding.

I knew he just needed a listening ear. Although he admitted that he didn't mention me to Janine even once, I encouraged him to tell her about me casually, because I knew there was really nothing to hide. One early morning, he called me up to tell me that he and Janine had a misunderstanding because of me

He told Janine about me and that there was a possibility that he was already falling for me. Naturally, she got jealous, and mad. At that time I didn't know how to feel, but more than anything I pitied myself. I didn't have the slightest intention of doing them harm.
After that incident, I suggested to Rico that we should not spend too much time together. Things went back to normal, but still he would stay with me whenever time permits, and I would remind him of Janine.

He even went to ask me if he was falling for me, I casually told him that he just missed Janine. After all, they spent almost half of their lives together.

To make things easier for us, I kept myself busy. I'd go out with other friends and stop rendering overtime work (to the detriment of my career). And I am already entertaining suitors because I'm capable of loving again.

I've read somewhere that we shouldn't waste time to show someone we love them. In my case, I have to defy such belief. I know there are a lot of other people who are in the same predicament I'm in right now.
It's hard but we have to be strong.

There are times I just want to resign from work. I don't know how long I can hold on but still I'm hoping that we'll remain friends.

Please pray for me and for people like me.

Love,

Mia

Dear Mia,

Sometimes we wonder why just can't we fall in love and be happy. Why does there always have to be a string of constraint and confusion attached to it. Why can't we just love someone and not be guilty about feeling that way.

Mia, it's a cold hard fact, that not all the people we choose to love may be able to return the same feelings. They may either be committed to someone else or may not be interested in us at all

But, Rico must have liked you a lot for he would not have had the courage to tell his girlfriend about his feelings for you. But you knew you never wanted to be the cause of conflict so you backed off to a safe distance. I think he understood your message and somehow realized that he can never be more than a friend to you.

But, he thought wrongly. Now you are the one falling and hoping against hope that you may find love in him again.

Mia, your work doesn't have to suffer just because you have fallen in love with your officemate. You cannot turn your back from what your heart cries out for. Somehow, you would have to get your act together and deal with this sweeping emotion. How long do you think can you hide your affection that grows as each day passes? How long can you make excuses to avoid him?

Mia, sometimes the easiest way to get the weight off our chest is to honestly let the other person know how we feel. Tell Rico that you are avoiding him because you are afraid of falling in love too deep that you may never be able to get out of it. Let him know that you just wanted to get it off your chest and that you are not in any way expecting anything from him. At least you would not have to worry about him finding out from someone else. After this, close this book and go on with your life.

He may remain as your friend or you may lose him forever. But, he may also return your feelings in a way that you would never expect. Then, this would have to be a new chapter. Mia, live by the day and deal with your emotions as they come. Be honest with yourself and true to what you feel. Let us always remember that love never grows when it is secretly kept locked in our hearts. Love will only find fulfillment when it finds its way out and dwells in the heart of that person destined to keep it.

Love,
Joe